Column for Jan. 28, 2010

I just cooked a homemade meal for the family consisting of freshly made meatballs and baked ziti and we all ate heartily. Family meal time occasionally entails some "guy time" with our six-year-old. Just this past week, he had time off from school and I had a day off from work, so we did what many dads and first graders do, we headed to McDonald's. It is something small, but my boy enjoys going and I enjoy the time together. McDonald's is a family sort of restaurant, so I expect a family atmosphere. Boy were we surprised at how wrong my expectations were that day.

While we were enjoying a Happy Meal and an Angus burger, there was a young female who was standing near the dining area and talking loudly on a cell phone. I say female since she was certainly not a lady. She was unleashing a barrage of "F bombs" and other vulgarities at high volume into the telephone mouthpiece. I am fairly tolerant of crude language, having grown up in a family and culture where every other word seemingly was a cuss word. When I was a young stupid heathen, that was normal fare. As a middle aged Christian, I certainly endeavor to refrain from such. When it it affects my children, I get a bit ornery. I let this female continue for a bit, and even gave her a few dirty looks, which she well saw. She knew that I was annoyed, but she continued to disrespect every person within earshot and cuss worse than any sailor I have known.

After cringing for a few minutes and giving her time to desist, I just could not take this blatant disrespect any longer. I turned to this female and shouted, "Hey! There are children present! If you don't curb the language, I am going to take away your phone!" Upon hearing this, she immediately withdrew from the immediate area, though staying within view, took the volume down to a whisper, and remained quietly on the phone for a while longer. I don't know if she continued the same crude subject matter about which I can not write, but she was at least not offensive to all nearby.

My wife likes to watch American Idol. I don't watch a lot of television, even though I work in the television industry. When I do, I like to catch a show that we can enjoy as family. Two weeks ago, there was a Black, retired military, 62 year old man named Larry Pratt who has since become a media sensation. Though not eligible for the show, the producers allowed him to audition, presumably for the sake of entertaining television. He made up a song that impugns young males of his own race who wear their boxer shorts exposed well above their pants. Their pants are usually at or below butt cheek level. This is a cultural thing full of disrespect rather than a racial thing, in all honesty. One's race has nothing to do with the values to which one chooses to adhere or the degree of respect one has for other people and for self.

The song was entitled, "Pants On the Ground". It went like this:
"Pants on the ground,
Pants on the ground,
Lookin' like a fool,
With your pants on the ground!"

There were other lyrics, but you get the idea. A mature, respectful Black man was annoyed at the disrespect shown by his own people. He had the guts to stand up to it on television in front of millions of viewers and he has received a lot of media attention, guest appearances on talk shows, and millions of discussions and video plays of his performance on the internet. He stood up against disrespectful behavior, and there are too few people today who do that. I did that once at a Raleigh fast food restaurant and once at CiCi's Pizza in Smithfield and both times I was threatened with bodily harm and cussed out. Eh, stand in line.

That is one thing I liked about Stancil's Amoco Food Shop (now a Marathon gas station) on Pollock Street. I don't know if the sign is still there on their entrance door, but it said something like "People with exposed undergarments not allowed in store". I respect those who stand up for public decency, especially at the risk of a loss of business, and patronize them as a result. If more people stood up for decency and respect, perhaps we would not have so many "pants on the ground" and can stop cussing, hollering females at the Golden Arches.