Column for Oct. 15, 2009

"Shut up, dogs!" I hollered from my bedroom. The barking stopped for just a moment, then continued. Both Barack Odoga and Daisy the killer Pekingese kept yapping...and yapping. "That's unusual," I thought. Hearing the dogs bark in the middle of the night was not especially odd. We get that a lot in this area. One of the neighborhood dogs barks at a pedestrian or cat, and the alarm system travels throughout the neighborhood. This time, however, something was different in how my two canines kept barking.

I wiped the sleepiness out of my eyes, as it was about 1:30 in the morning. I stumbled my way towards the bedroom door to make my way to the living room, where the pups were both on alert. "What is it, babies?" I asked. I looked around the room after turning on the ceiling fan light switch and saw a normal living room, just as I left it earlier in the evening. I walked into the bathroom, my office, and around the kitchen to ensure that nothing was wrong. I had listened to hear if I could hear what the dogs were barking about before I even got out of bed. The baby monitor often amplifies sound that only the dogs hear before I do. I often hear movement, outside dogs, and outdoor noises on the monitor before I do naturally. I did not hear anything out of the ordinary.

When I walked back into the living room, both dogs stood at attention, pointing towards the door to the carport. I flipped on the floodlight to the driveway and cracked open the living room door to the carport. I peered out to see if anyone was standing in my driveway, but saw nothing. When I looked down at the three brick stairs below my door stoop, I saw a body laying there clad in denim, sneakers, and white socks. I peered through the living room window and could not see much better.

Since the door opening, the dogs barking, and the light did not make the person stir, I figured that some drunken individual had passed out on my door step. I immediately put on some jeans, shoes, a shirt, and went to one of my gun safes. I despise the gun control laws that require me to lock up firearms since I have children in the house. I believe in safe handling, teaching respect for firearms, and having loaded weapons available at a moment's notice. Since becoming a dad, I complied with state law and locked them up (that's my story and I'm sticking to it). I went to the safe with my favorite revolver for concealed carry purposes, which also has a laser grip sight and wanted to at least carry it, should I need to take action. Since this is not where I keep my quick grab firearms, I had not used this piece in months. I found that the electronic lock was dead. This is not what one wants to run across when needing quick access to a gun. Fortunately, there was no imminent danger in this situation, so I took the time to try to solve the lock issue. Eventually, I used key access and figured I would fix the stupid thing later. Thankfully, that particular safe only held one gun.

I debated whether it was tactically better to handle this vagrant myself or to simply let the local constabulary force handle the situation. I weighed the pros and cons. If I took care of it myself, I would ensure that this individual was removed from my property on my terms and if medical assistance was necessary, my long expired emergency medical technician skills would come in handy. On the other hand, I am one person, and the police usually send at least two officers should things get physical. I had no idea if this person is armed or not or what would happen if he was startled awake suddenly. I could have gone out another door and approached the subject. However, I figured it was tactically best to have the local police to come remove the drunk.

Well, it turned out that an illegal immigrant with little or no English speaking capability had been so intoxicated that he either could not make it back to his residence or thought that my house was his and he just could not get through the door. Unfortunately, the Latino population, especially those here illegally, have a high instance of alcohol abuse. I understand being away from home and lonely, but there is still no excuse for drunkenness. Or illegal immigration, for that matter. At least he was not driving. I read far too many stories of drunken Latino drivers killing innocent people.

I have a t-shirt that says, "I DON'T DIAL 911" and has a picture of a Smith and Wesson 45 auto pistol firing (it looks like a model 4506, for you gun aficionados out there). Two things I know are that when it is not an emergency situation, it is worth it to sit back and wait for local law enforcement to handle non emergency situations. If it was a life threatening situation, I would have definitely done things differently. I also know that I despise gun laws, since they seldom deter law breakers but often inhibit law abiding citizens.